The vaguries of Peep geeking
Feb. 22nd, 2007 01:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
starzkiI went grocery shopping today and found that, in preparation for Easter, they're already selling Peeps. Oh, delicious, marshmallow-y, sugar-y, no-nutritional-value-whatsoever-y Peeps.
Then, I though I should share exactly how one must eat a Peep with the Internet. I was told this in specific detail some years ago, but I forget who and where, so I cannot give proper credit. But I thought that my passing on the specific rules of Peep geekery might be homage enough to that wonderful person who taught me.
You're welcome.
Then, I though I should share exactly how one must eat a Peep with the Internet. I was told this in specific detail some years ago, but I forget who and where, so I cannot give proper credit. But I thought that my passing on the specific rules of Peep geekery might be homage enough to that wonderful person who taught me.
How to Geek a Peep:
1. Follow all the rules to eating a Peep, for none are negotiable.
2. Purchase Peeps. Any Peeps not in "chick" form are illegal. Any Peeps not yellow are especially illegal.
3. With a sharpened No. 2 pencil, poke a hole in the cellophane packaging of the yellow chick Peeps. The hole may be widened if necessary, but the Peeps are not to be removed from the cellophane.
4. The package of Peeps must then be put on top of the refrigerator. They must remain there for a minimum of two weeks (more is often better). This will give the Peep chick a chance to mature. It is, therefore, less cruel to the Peep. Also, it will give the resulting Peep a much more nuanced (chewy) consistency.
5. After the two weeks have passed, the Peeps may be eaten. However, care must be taken to eat the Peep so a minimum of cruelty is the result. Never eat a Peep in the presence of his fellow Peeps. It is best if all Peeps are kept ignorant of their fate. Chaos can and will ensue if care is not taken to reduce cruelty. And this is to say nothing of the guilt. Therefore, each Peep must be eaten individually, away from his friends and cousins from the package.
6. To properly geek a Peep, take the one Peep to a quiet place so that it is lulled into a sense of security. Again, to reduce the inherent cruelty of geeking, turn the Peep away from you so that he or she cannot see what is coming. Then, cleanly bite the head off of the Peep. This must be done in one bite. Now, your Peep has been properly geeked.
7. You may eat the rest of the Peep in whatever manner you see fit.
8. Enjoy the sweet, sweet deliciousness that will invade your soul.
1. Follow all the rules to eating a Peep, for none are negotiable.
2. Purchase Peeps. Any Peeps not in "chick" form are illegal. Any Peeps not yellow are especially illegal.
3. With a sharpened No. 2 pencil, poke a hole in the cellophane packaging of the yellow chick Peeps. The hole may be widened if necessary, but the Peeps are not to be removed from the cellophane.
4. The package of Peeps must then be put on top of the refrigerator. They must remain there for a minimum of two weeks (more is often better). This will give the Peep chick a chance to mature. It is, therefore, less cruel to the Peep. Also, it will give the resulting Peep a much more nuanced (chewy) consistency.
5. After the two weeks have passed, the Peeps may be eaten. However, care must be taken to eat the Peep so a minimum of cruelty is the result. Never eat a Peep in the presence of his fellow Peeps. It is best if all Peeps are kept ignorant of their fate. Chaos can and will ensue if care is not taken to reduce cruelty. And this is to say nothing of the guilt. Therefore, each Peep must be eaten individually, away from his friends and cousins from the package.
6. To properly geek a Peep, take the one Peep to a quiet place so that it is lulled into a sense of security. Again, to reduce the inherent cruelty of geeking, turn the Peep away from you so that he or she cannot see what is coming. Then, cleanly bite the head off of the Peep. This must be done in one bite. Now, your Peep has been properly geeked.
7. You may eat the rest of the Peep in whatever manner you see fit.
8. Enjoy the sweet, sweet deliciousness that will invade your soul.
You're welcome.
