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It's NOT the same.
Jul. 2nd, 2007 09:55 pmArrgh!
I called my mom to ask about this and that. I said hi to my dad who started in on me again about my lack of progress on my proposal.
I'm really, really fucking sick of it right now. It's not like it's not frustrating enough to sit in front of a blank screen day after day without mustering the motivation to write the same damn things I've been writing about for the last 3 years, but I have to hear that I just have to "git 'er done."
Shut up! If it was that easy, it'd be fucking done now, wouldn't it?
And as I'm expressing this frustration to my mom, she says that I'm just like my sister. My sister is upset because she's graduated college, can't find a job, is waiting tables, moving out of her apartment (that she can't afford any more), and is on the verge of breaking up with her boyfriend.
Yeah, Mom, my boredom with my research topic and lack of motivation to write another 200 agonizing pages about it is just the same. :-/
What I need from my mom and dad is them just getting off my case. I'll finish the dissertation if I want to. This leaves the possibility that I may not finish it, but that's not really anything that affects them. I'm paying for my own graduate education and if I leave school with "only" a Masters, that's my choice. The thing is that I know that I'll finish it. I just have an enormous hump to get over, first. But telling me to work harder when I feel that I'm working as hard as I can is not helping. If Sisyphus's parents yelled at him, he'd not have gotten to the top in the first place to find out that he had to do the same thing over and over again. He'd have yelled back at his parents and the rock would have squished him.
I think I'm going to start lying to them about my progress just to shut them up. :(
I called my mom to ask about this and that. I said hi to my dad who started in on me again about my lack of progress on my proposal.
I'm really, really fucking sick of it right now. It's not like it's not frustrating enough to sit in front of a blank screen day after day without mustering the motivation to write the same damn things I've been writing about for the last 3 years, but I have to hear that I just have to "git 'er done."
Shut up! If it was that easy, it'd be fucking done now, wouldn't it?
And as I'm expressing this frustration to my mom, she says that I'm just like my sister. My sister is upset because she's graduated college, can't find a job, is waiting tables, moving out of her apartment (that she can't afford any more), and is on the verge of breaking up with her boyfriend.
Yeah, Mom, my boredom with my research topic and lack of motivation to write another 200 agonizing pages about it is just the same. :-/
What I need from my mom and dad is them just getting off my case. I'll finish the dissertation if I want to. This leaves the possibility that I may not finish it, but that's not really anything that affects them. I'm paying for my own graduate education and if I leave school with "only" a Masters, that's my choice. The thing is that I know that I'll finish it. I just have an enormous hump to get over, first. But telling me to work harder when I feel that I'm working as hard as I can is not helping. If Sisyphus's parents yelled at him, he'd not have gotten to the top in the first place to find out that he had to do the same thing over and over again. He'd have yelled back at his parents and the rock would have squished him.
I think I'm going to start lying to them about my progress just to shut them up. :(
