This isn't funny, but sadly accurate:

La telenovela de Wrigleyville:

Me:  Baby, I don't think I can continue this relationship.  You hurt me too bad.  Every year, I think it's going to change, but every year, I end up just all beat up.
CUBBIES:  I promise, this time is different.  Haven't I treated you well all summer?
Me:  Well...  Not at first.
CUBBIES:  Aww, baby, it's only July and August that count.  You know that.
Me:  ...
CUBBIES:  Baby, come on, you know this time is different.
Me:  Yeah?
CUBBIES:  I swear.  I'm good this year.  This year, I'll be the best.
Me:  Really?  Because, I mean, that would make me so happy.
CUBBIES: (Games 1 and 2)  *POW*  *POW*
Me:  Cubbies!  Why?  This hurts me so much!  *sob*
CUBBIES:  Give me one more chance.
Me:  This may be it.  Baby, I can't take this much longer.
/scene

Game 3:  It's not looking good.  DDDD: